Has your DE&I Achieved Belonging?

May 30, 2021May 30, 2021 / Coach Sandra Dillon / Leave a comment

First there was Diversity (D) with affirmative action, then Inclusion (I) was added to the equation and more recently Equity (E). With DE&I at the forefront of current political and social action, where does this initiative go next? How do we measure the outcomes? How do we know when we’ve reached the goals of DE&I?

As a part-time consultant with ALULA, my kudos go to these leaders who are taking DE&I to the next level—belonging (B). With the launch of their intranet site UBelong, ALULA has tapped into an important fourth variable or at least the ultimate measurement of what DE&I set out to accomplish.

Why is belonging an important part of the DE&I equation? Because it taps into an important motivation that explains why people do what they do. Belonging represents how people feel—a powerful element—about being in connection with a company, colleagues, a cause, or community, and in general with each other.

Diversity represents a number, equity measures distribution, inclusion focuses on the behavior, and belonging describes the feeling. Companies can be committed to diversity in hiring and promotion, allocate training and services to those who need them most, and practice inclusive behaviors and yet still miss the mark on creating a deep sense of community. Inclusion can positively influence belonging no doubt but doesn’t guarantee it.

Companies tend to shy away from dealing with employees’ feelings. Yes, feelings are real and powerful motivations, and definitely challenging to influence and measure. Yet, if we don’t try to tap into and influence how people feel, we won’t be taking DE&I as far as it can go.

About the Author: Sandra Dillon is a professional life coach with an extensive background in leadership, sales, and business consulting. She has a passion to help people be the hero of their own life story. She administers assessments, designs, and facilitates workshops, and coaches individuals, teams, and businesses. You can learn more about Sandra or engage her as your coach by reaching out to her at coach.sandra.dillon@gmail.com or by visiting her website at www.shinecrossings.com

Coaching Vs. Counseling for the Introverted

May 7, 2021May 2, 2021 / Coach Sandra Dillon / Leave a comment

A life coaching client said to me regarding his experience with prior counseling, “I do a lot of talking but don’t feel it changes anything. I’m an internal processor, not an external one. I like to think and pray on it.” When he shared this thought, I saw some past correlations in my practice with other clients.

Reflecting on clients I’ve come to know well and understand as introverts have also commented, “I’ve been to counseling for years, and never made the progress that I’ve had in a few coaching sessions with you?” When I asked one why he thought that, his response: “We have a dialogue, you give me different perspectives and tools, then I can go off, think about it, and have work to do. I like having goals because it helps me see the progress I’m making. I didn’t get any of that in counseling. I basically answered questions and wasn’t even sure what I said was true at the time. I needed more time to think about it.”

Why Coaching May Be More Effective Than Counseling

Coaching is different than counseling, and I believe for people who identify with introversion, coaching can be more impactful process, because it enables the client to do most of the work outside of the session and at their pace. Coaching is future focused toward change and allows the client to process thoughts and feelings in the environment that serves them best. There’s plenty of work to be done outside the session, but during it, the coach provides perspectives, insights, and tools, as well as serves as a brainstorming partner.

Counseling, on the other hand, demands to know your thoughts and feelings right there to questions asked by the counselor such as (1) what do you think of… or (2) how do you feel about… As one introverted coaching client told me, “I would get asked questions and feel like I needed to respond. I wasn’t in touch with my feelings and wanted to go off and think about it. I wished my counselor would’ve just sent me a list of questions that I mull over before showing up. I would’ve felt better prepared and that I got my money’s worth.” Additionally, my clients who’ve shared their experiences with counseling said they got insights into their feelings, but then was left with the unanswered question of “what do I do next”.

Many counselors never see or interact with their clients between sessions. Coaches usually make themselves available in multiple capacities in between. Counseling has its place and benefits but don’t discounted that life coaching can be more impactful, especially for clients who prefer introverted processing.

There’s an expression that rings true: not everyone needs a counselor, but everyone can benefit from a coach. And this may be especially true for those who self-identify as introverted.

Work Trends: Coaching at the Office for Mental Well-Being

April 29, 2021April 29, 2021 / Coach Sandra Dillon / 3 Comments

Today there’s a lot of talk about mental health in the workplace. COVID has taken a measurable toll on people’s lives and their capacity to cope and remain resilient. Depression, fatigue, and loss productivity are only a few outcomes for those struggling to keep jobs, do more with less, parent, and work from home. How are people responding? Prescriptions for anti-depressants, anti-anxiety, and insomnia have increased by double digits.

Medical intervention has its place, and companies should be applauded for offering Employee Assistance Programs (EAP) and other counseling services through their benefits program. However, there’s less medically evasive solutions that can help workers not only to cope but find ways to thrive in the new normal. The best tool in the tool life kit may be coaching.

Many times, people don’t need a pill to calm their nerves, they need a coach to help them see a different picture: set a vision, strategize on options, develop a plan, learn new tools, adopt a different mindset, find support, and partner with them through the journey to the opposite side of the continuum of mental well-being. Many people already have the solution inside of themselves. They need a coach to help them untangle the thoughts into a well-conceived plan or share some tools that will make them the master of their lives.

I applaud those businesses that offer coaching to their employees as an alternative to medical intervention. If your company doesn’t offer free or nominal fee coaching, there’s nothing stopping you from hiring your own coach. Coaching isn’t therapy, it’s targeted support. Do you need a pill, or do you really need a coach?

The Second Wave of a New Normal: How Will You Respond?

April 23, 2021April 25, 2021 / Coach Sandra Dillon / 1 Comment

People keep talking about a new normal and asking: what’s the new normal going to look like and will life be anything like pre-COVID? The reality: we’re moving into a second wave of “a new normal”. The first was exclusively working from home, fighting for internet bandwidth, home schooling while working full-time, learning how to cook versus eat out, finding a closet to work privately, wearing masks, obsessing over pandemic statistics on TV, entertaining bored children, and keeping teenagers from consuming even more technology. These were the struggles for the lucky who still had jobs. As if we didn’t have enough imbalance, we added several more responsibilities to juggle in new ways. Some people are mastering the change, while others are still trying. Now…

…the pendulum is swinging back. Just when you felt like you’d gotten command of this new way of balancing work and home, your employer talks about bringing you back into the office. But this isn’t about stepping into the old way from a year ago. Not everyone is going back at the same time, the work environment is setup differently, and some services you depend on for the old normal aren’t available or they cost more. You’ve restructured life during the regime of COVID. We are entering the second wave of a new normal, which…

…brings on a new set of problems and possible anxieties. Perhaps even your pets are having separation anxiety thinking about you returning to the office and leaving them home all day. What can you do?

Acknowledge that it’s okay that you’re feeling overwhelmed and recognize it’s because we are entering into a second round of trying to create a new normal. Give yourself credit for weathering through the first round and have faith that you can do it again. This isn’t as easy as picking up where you left off.
Decide what mindset you’re going to adopt? Are you going to have a fixed or growth mindset? If you’re not sure what mindset you have, you can learn more about mindset by reading The Power of a Growth Mindset and the Risk of Holding on the Fixed. How will you look at the change? Will it be an opportunity to create something new or will you grudgingly look at it as “woe is me or why me”? Will you see this change as an opportunity for growth or an excuse of why you have it so bad?
Find your tribe and support system. You weren’t designed to go it alone. We were built to live in community, to support one another, and to be supported. We need to be both givers and receivers of support.
Consider hiring a life coach to be your partner to help you develop a vision of your future, design a game plan, hold you accountable, and be your cheerleader.

We won’t be going back as we move into the future. Tomorrow brings a new set of struggles never seen before. Stay confident, have faith, set a vision, create a plan, and take action.

The 4Ps of Success: Purpose, Passion, Pursuit and Persistence

December 1, 2020December 1, 2020 / Coach Sandra Dillon / 1 Comment

People often ask, “Is there a formula an entrepreneur follows that helps assure success?” An established company may focus on the 4Ps of product, place, price, and promotion; however, in my experience the 4Ps that a self-made person drives on are purpose, passion, pursuit, and persistence.

Becoming an entrepreneur who plans on making a living as a self-employed entity truly needs a business plan. This plan goes far beyond the requirements that might be asked by a venture capitalist investor. Speaking as an entrepreneur, starting a business is rough and not for the faint of heart. As the old saying goes, “When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” That’s the mantra of the successful entrepreneur.

What does that really mean in today’s business terms? Although I haven’t studied the statistics in the coaching profession, I imagine they would be similar to real estate. My realtor friends say that 90% of licensed agents quit, because the walk is too long before seeing any sustainable income. That’s why it’s important to build a foundation on the 4Ps.

Purpose: I was called into this profession while still working in Corporate America in the chemical industry. I had a deep desire to apply my skills, knowledge, and competencies to help other people be successful in their lives. This was truly a calling. I had a deep sense of purpose.

Passion: This purpose was fueled by my passion. What’s my fuel? Feedback from my clients describing how I had a hand in changing their lives for the better. Their words are the premium unleaded that fills my tank after driving on fumes. After nearly 40 decades of work, there’s nothing more rewarding than knowing you changed a life.

Pursuit: People may not know what I do, the value I bring, or that they even need my services. Days of frustration naturally come with the territory. Clients don’t line up at the front door after hanging up the “open for business” shingle. An entrepreneur must be a go-getter and connector. The law of pursuit is critical to success, just like it’s critical in all relationships.

Persistence: I know some entrepreneurs who have purpose, passion, and pursuit, and yet, don’t have the staying power for the long-haul. Although there’s always exceptions to the rule, many entrepreneurs underestimate the time and effort it takes to achieve critical business thresholds. Studies show that people don’t accurately estimate schedule or fully absorbed cost. I believe people don’t identify all risk factors, calculate and apply probabilities, and/or know how best to mitigate risk. Hence, one of the best tools of the entrepreneur is persistence and resilience.

The 4Ps are fundamental not just in business but in life as well. These 4Ps apply to my life coaching clients who are identifying purpose with passion and receiving coaching accountability for pursuit and persistence. Of the four 4Ps, which ones are missing or shining dimly in your life? Which ones need more attention to propel you forward? If you’d like some help mapping out your 4Ps in life, reach out for a conversation.

About the Author: Sandra Dillon is a professional life coach with an extensive background in leadership and business consulting. She has a passion to help people be the hero of their own life stories. She administers assessments, designs, and facilitates workshops, and coaches individuals, teams, and businesses. You can learn more about Sandra or engage her as your coach by reaching out to her at coach.sandra.dillon@gmail.com or by visiting her website at www.shinecrossings.com

Your Core Values: How They Show Up at Work

September 9, 2020September 9, 2020 / Coach Sandra Dillon / Leave a comment

Our core values, whether we realize it or not, drive how we feel, what we think, and more importantly what we do. If companies operate by a standard set of values, stated or not, how do your core values align with your employer’s? Where do they complement, co-exist, or rub each other the wrong way?

Most people haven’t intentionally thought of identifying and unpacking their core values. However, when they do take the time, my clients have light bulb moments: “Ah-ha, that explains it.” The opportunity to express core values is a significant contributor toward your feelings of fulfillment and ultimate success at work, and on the flipside, the suppression of your core values can produce feelings of dread when you think about another day of work.

We all have triggers that let us know something’s not right. Perhaps mine are like yours. When I can jump out of bed early on weekend mornings but need 3 or 4 hits of the snooze bar during the work week, that’s my signal I need a core value check and possible adjustment.

Wearing my hat as a life coach, clients ask me for help in changing careers. Our first step is to separate work from the company. For instance, one of my clients wanted to get out of sales, because it was too frustrating. After we unpacked his current situation, he concluded that he loved sales, building relationships, and the thrill of the hunt. What he also realized was how his employer tied his hands, dictated his process, and his current boss knew only how to supervise account managers but had no skill in leading business development.

Once my client clearly understood that three of his top five core values were leadership, creativity, and independence, he agreed that sales/business development was the right career for him. He just needed to find a company whose values aligned with his, so he could perform at his best. Instead of switching careers, he switched companies by learning how to interview for the right company culture and boss for a win-win.

If you don’t know what your top core values are and how to unpack them in a meaningful way for future decision-making, reach out for a coaching conversation.

5 Principles for Designing Effective Workshops

July 20, 2020July 21, 2020 / Coach Sandra Dillon / 1 Comment

The internet has a wealth of information available to anyone at the click of a mouse. You can read articles, view webinars, and watch videos on how to do just about everything. It seems like everyone is giving away their content for free. If there’s so much free information available on the web, why do businesses continue to invest in employee training? Why do people still hire coaches? Because training and coaching, if designed right, can provide a radically different experience that is more meaningful and has a greater likelihood of retention and being put into practice.

If you are designing a workshop, there a several principles to keep in mind that will produce a more impactful training session.

Collaborate with the leader to plan, deliver, and execute the content. People will be more engaged when they have some control over the what, when, and how they learn.
Make sure the information is applicable to the audience now. What are the challenges in the work environment today? What practical information can be put into practice immediately to improve outcomes? Information designed for future circumstances will easily be forgotten within 2 weeks.
Draw out the audience’s past experiences into the learning process. When people can analyze and process information against previous failures and successes, the workshop content comes alive. The audience can make new connections, sees possibilities, and draw new conclusions.
Have the group use reasoning and solve problems in the workshop. Most people hate or at best are bored with learning facts and figures. When people engage their minds with the material, they are more apt to retain the information and be excited to put it to use in their job.
Use storytelling to bring the material alive. Storytelling has been used to pass along information and concepts since before pen and paper were invented. The human mind is programmed to learn through storytelling, share meaningful stories that drive home important points.

About the Author: Sandra Dillon is a professional life coach with an extensive background in leadership and business consulting. She has a passion to help people be the hero of their own life stories. She administers assessments, designs and facilitates workshops, and coaches individuals, teams, and businesses. You can learn more about Sandra or engage her as your coach by reaching out to her at coach.sandra.dillon@gmail.com or by visiting her website at www.shinecrossings.com

Core Values: the Link Between Life and Business Coaching

June 25, 2020June 24, 2020 / Coach Sandra Dillon / Leave a comment

When I life coach, invariably my clients will complete a core values assessment. Why? Because whether they are aware of it or not, core values drive personal meaning, purpose, and fulfillment. And I want to help my clients understand why they make certain decisions, choose to act in specific ways, and feel joy as well as frustration. Discovering your core values will help you understand certain dynamics in your life and empower you to choose a new course for your future.

Businesses, like life coaching clients, also set visions and define missions. If you work for any size company, you’ve likely noticed vision and mission statements nicely framed and hung in conference rooms. Perhaps the leadership has gone so far as to laminate them on a business card for their employees to carry around. In most cases, however, there’s likely no values to complement the vision and mission.

I find that many businesses skip values and rush straight to developing their strategy. Wait! Values are an incredible part of defining who the company is when it grows up. Values shape culture, provide operating guidelines, and attract people who have a shared passion for the vision and mission. People tend to resonate more with values than they do with vision and mission statements. Current and future employees want to know what a company stands as they make a judgment on whether this is the place for them to work.

If you’re a business leader and your company hasn’t defined its values, I can help your team as a coaching facilitator. If you’re an individual who would like to learn more about what makes you tick, reach out for a conversation.

About the Author: Sandra Dillon is a professional life coach with an extensive background in leadership and business consulting. She has a passion to help people be the hero of their own life stories. She administers assessments, designs and facilitates workshops, and coaches individuals, teams, and businesses. You can learn more about Sandra or engage her as your coach by reaching out to her at coach.sandra.dillon@gmail.com or by visiting her website at www.shinecrossings.com

Don’t Forget to Pack Your Core Values for Your Business Mission

June 15, 2020June 12, 2020 / Coach Sandra Dillon / Leave a comment

Vision and mission, a staple of life coaching, have easily translated into business. Almost all companies of any size have some sort of vision and mission statement. They serve as a legitimizing tool, so when a company doesn’t have an answer to, “What’s your vision and mission,” it’s almost as if the leadership doesn’t know what the company wants to be when it grows up.

In my experience, vision and mission statements range from a check-the-box activity such as creating a website to serving as the foundation for strategy and critical decision-making. And identifying the company’s values that underlie the vision and mission becomes the fuel for business growth and hiring decisions.

When I life coach, I help clients identify their core values, because whether clients know theirs or not, they are trying to live them out in their behaviors and decisions. I’ve had many clients have light bulb moments and say, “That explains it,” as they work through struggle and roadblocks.

The concept of core values defines who you are, what you stand for, and provides predictability. This applies to an individual’s life and even more so for a business. If leveraged appropriately, a company’s values help define culture and help leadership provide the how of work for their employees. Values are also important in the hiring process, because they provide clarity to prospective employees on what they would be signing up for when they join the team.

If you’d like to learn more about the power of core values and/or go through a core values coaching session(s) for you or your business, reach out for a conversation.

About the Author: Sandra Dillon is a professional life coach with an extensive background in leadership and business consulting. She has a passion to help people be the hero of their own life stories. She administers assessments, designs and facilitates workshops, and coaches individuals, teams, and businesses. You can engage her as your coach by reaching out to coach.sandra.dillon@gmail.com or learn more by visiting her website at www.shinecrossings.com

The Power of And, But, and Because

June 10, 2020June 11, 2020 / Coach Sandra Dillon / 2 Comments

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Some words pack a powerful punch in how they affect the message from all the other words strung together before or after them. What are these words? They’re usually the conjunctions like and, but, and or. For Baby Boomers and Gen-Xers who grew up on Schoolhouse Rock, you probably have a little song playing in your head right now.

Conjunction Junction, what’s their function?
I got “and”, “but”, and “or”,
They’ll get you pretty far.

Although our body language and tone of voice are major influencers in how we communicate, choices in simple words can change the message. You should be sensitive to use the right one for the right intent. My favorite conjunctions are and, but, and because, and each provides a very different message.

And is the connector that keeps the conversation going and the ideas building. You’ll see the masters of improv exclusively use this word to allow the following person to continue with the next idea. If frequency were an indication of people’s favorite conjuntion, I would guess it would be but. “I hear what you’re saying, but…..” or “I like your idea, but…” But is the perfect word to negate everything that was said before it. Sometimes I don’t think people even realize what that one little word does to the previous speaker. And then there’s the conjunction because.

Whereas and keeps the conversation going, and but invalidates the idea before it, because blends the power of the and with an assumption of action. What are your thoughts of each message?

“I like your idea about forming a small task force to address the problems with the manufacturing process, but I think it’ll take too long to get all the people who have expertise in the same room at the same time.”
“I like your idea about forming a small task force to address the problems with the manufacturing process, and we’ll need to consider how long it will take to get all the people who have expertise in the same room at the same time.”
“I like your idea about forming a small task force to address the problems with the manufacturing process, because we have the expertise. We’ll need to get all these people in the same room at the same time.”

Most people don’t pay much attention to their conjunctions. How about you? Hopefully, you might be more selective in your next conversation.

About the Author: Sandra Dillon is a professional life coach with an extensive background in leadership and business consulting. She has a passion to help people be the hero of their own life stories. She administers assessments, designs and facilitates workshops, and coaches both individuals and teams. You can learn more about Sandra or engage her as your coach by reaching out to her at coach.sandra.dillon@gmail.com or by visiting her website at www.shinecrossings.com

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